Serving With Honor

Bucket List Addition # 1

2011-10-30T18:40:00.000-07:00

So excited to start formulating my bucket list! The link below will guide any and all interested parties to one of my most favorite additions!!! Enjoy!

http://www.great-wall-marathon.com/Default.aspx

A post on weaning...

2011-10-30T16:13:00.000-07:00

So, I have read several posts and articles lately about parents weaning their children from items that bring their children comfort. Now, I understand and agree that a 4 year old likely does NOT need a pacifier for bed time or general comfort. There are a number of credible resources that prove prolonged attachment to a pacifier has several consequences. I get that! My issue is with other things...like "weaning" them from their blankets, their favorite stuffed animal, etc. When I was a kid, I don't remember being weaned from anything. I confidently remember gradually growing out of my need for my favorite "stuffy" or blanket. I grew out of my need for a night light...mind you I was 14 years old. Only kidding people! LOL! My kiddos, almost 6 and 3, still sleep with a multitude of "stuffies" and their favorite blankets. I love that my girls find comfort in things that Jerry and I specifically gifted them--and that they have the opportunity to have them close when away from home or under extreme stress (ie: moves, surgeries, etc) "R" does not take her blanket to school and our girls don't have them with them all of the time...and perhaps that is where I am lost. Do some kids have their blankets and "stuffies" with them at all time? If so, and this is not to be judgmental, but is there something in their life that is overwhelming them or making them feel the need for attachment? I just don't see the need or rush to force kids out of having their favorite blanket. I am not sure if I have the "wrong" idea or if I am a different "breed" of mother...but I love having my girls snuggle up with me and cover up in their blankets. I look at those "stuffies" and blankets as a part of their patch work...a peice of their story. We are creatures of habit and it is in our nature to form attachments...even to things and I think it is healthy. Any who, just wondering if I am lone wolf with these feelings?

30 Before 30 Update

2011-10-30T15:57:00.000-07:00

I removed the ones I have completed! So, my list grows smaller! I am also working on my "bucket list"...that post to follow soon. Enjoy!

1.GET DEBT FREE

2. No eating out for an entire year...this will be tough, but I love a challenge

3. Get my butt back in shape and run the marathon I have been "training" for---I have been "training" for the last 7 years ;) and run in at least 2 before I am 30

**4. Get accepted into the UC Denver MSN program

5. Finally take my honeymoon (on my 10 year anniversary) to Ireland

6. Sing a musical special at church

7. Play the part of Velma Kelly in Chicago (may just perform "All That Jazz" as a special)

9. Summit Pikes Peak

10. Advocate locally and abroad for the rights of women and children

11. Learn to knit

12. Learn Nordic Cross Country Skiing

13. Graduate with my Bachelor degree in Public Health

14. Attend a midwifery workshop at The Farm Midwifery Center

15. Learn a foreign language (French, I think...)

16. Make myself, "R", and "A" our own dresses

17. Get another tattoo

19. Become a CAPPA Certified Lactation Educator

20. Travel on Route 66

23. Organize a community COMPOST and Sustainable Garden Club

24. Visit Washington DC and the surrounding communities (explore American history) with "J" and the girls

26. Grow my hair out passed my breasts (working on it!)

27. Write an article and have it published in Midwifery Today

28. Take a dance class...again (I danced for over 13 years (4 of which were at a professional level)

29. Take a family vacation with "J", "R", and "A"...and any additional children we might be blessed with

30. Be a key-note speaker at a birth professional related conference

COMPLETED!!

8. Read 20 non-medical books in a year

18. Read through the Bible

**22. Cook an entire cookbook

21. Journal daily in my daughters' journals (kept at is for 6 months now!)

25. Learn yoga (try to do it every day...usually only get about 3x a week)

Whoa! I have been tremendously undisciplined!!!

2011-10-30T15:25:00.000-07:00

Ok, so clearly I have failed in my quest to post a blog entry once a month. March 2011 was my last known effort...what can I say? LIFE!!! We have been very busy this year. Seems as though April hit and we were sucked into the whirl wind of LIFE! We have been very challenged and blessed this year, and yet, we are so grateful for the opportunity to just live.

Jerry has been increasingly busy at work with a list of new responsibilities. His unit is in rapid prepare mode of the upcoming deployment. Jerry is often working long/late nights and occasionally weekends. He is an amazing man--working hard to obtain balance between work and home. He spends every free minute with the girls--playing, reading, painting their toe nails (I know, he rocks!!). Jerry and I celebrated 8 years of marriage in May. Sadly, he was away in VA for training during that time. Upon his return, he blessed me with a massive and gorgeous bouquet of flowers and a wonderful/romantic dinner out! So blessed!! We are blessed to have Jerry home with us for the upcoming holidays and we are looking to make the most of them. So honored and blessed to have this amazing man in my life...always and forever.

"R" started school this fall and she is loving every minute of it. Jerry and I spent a multitude of hours researching home school options, different schools in our community and what was in fact, best for all of us. "R's" opinion and feelings mattered greatly to us, as well. With all things prayed and considered, we enrolled her at the local elementary school. She is thriving!! Her love of people, reading and learning have evolved and grown to levels I never could have imagined. She is learning to read, her penmanship is becoming more refined and her passion for music and art are being fostered. "R" and I are enjoying several new "big girl and mommy activities". One of our new favorites...watching "Once Upon A Time" together on Sunday nights. Yes, I know it puts her to bed almost an hour late but I so love watching her face light up with all of the wonder and amazement! She is such a thespian..hoping to get her into a youth theatre program this Spring. We are so proud of our big girl....who will be 6 yrs old in January! Whoa! She truly is a blessings and we are so thankful to have her in our lives. She is a wonderful big sister and an amazing daughter. She is the most amazing "Big Buddy!"

"Baby A"...what can I say? Well, perhaps I need to relinquish my desire to call her baby. We are knocking on the door of a 3rd birthday in just 20 short days! Whoa...where did the time go? Her birth seemed like yesterday...and yet, like every bit of 3 yrs ago. She is so impressive. "A" has a zest for life and a courageous spirit. She knows no fear (which makes my fear accelerate to new levels) and she has no hesitation when trying knew things (and when she is playing at something she has already mastered, she finds a new and creative way to go about it). She loves to read, play outside, eat (not much she doesn't love), chase our cat, etc. Don't get my wrong, she is all girl...just wrapped in a rough and tumble package. We often joke that "A's" slogan is "She takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'!" Boy, is that ever true! Aly encountered several head blows and full body bruises this summer...and nothing phased her! I think I gathered a few new grey hairs from the experiences...but I can live with those. I most certainly can NOT live without my "Little Buddy!"

I have been so rewarded and blessed these past several months. My doula business has been very busy--and I am so honored to walk with so many amazing women and families in their journey to welcoming a new member. I also began working with a local home birth midwife in our community. I attend prenatal appointments with her on Wednesday and have been so blessed to attend home births with her as well. It is my prayer that I never become immune to the reality--the reality that our GOD is awesome and walking with these women and families in birth is such a blessed honor. Since May, I have been blessed to serve as a doula or midwife assistant for 15 births and the numbers are still climbing in the remaining 2 months of 2011. So very blessed!! With each birth, I am reminded of my own births and that my girls will likely one day birth their own children. I want for my girls to have the knowledge to make good informed decisions and to feel supported in their choices! It is my desire that the world will look at birth differently...not looking at it as a medical procedure but that they will value their bodies and the mighty work they were created to do. I am looking forward to the remaining two months of the year. In a few weeks, we will celebrate "A's" 3rd birthday, Thanksgiving and Christmas!! I am very much looking forward to the time with my family, the food, the social time with friends, the snow, cooler temps, the many amazing festivities and so much more. So thankful to have Jerry home with us this year!!

I have many additional new projects. For one, I am in the process of writing a book. This is a truly amazing opportunity and has proven to be increasing theraputic for me. I am also working diligently in school...although, I have taken a few months off to catch up on finances and family time. Over all, we have so many things to be grateful for and we are looking forward to see where the Good Lord takes us in 2012!

MercyMe - Beautiful

2011-03-21T13:57:00.000-07:00

~Beautiful~

2011-03-21T13:34:00.000-07:00

"Beautiful"~ Webster defines "beautiful" as: "generally pleasing" or "of a highly aesthetic pleasure."

"J" and I often find ourselves embracing our girls and telling them that they are beautiful; or "J" will often tell me that I look exceptionally beautiful. Those are words that no wife minds hearing (whether I have moments of believing it or not). Recently, "R" started becoming very upset with us when we would tell her that she was beautiful. Extremely upset!

For the life of me, I could/can not understand why she would have such displeasure in being told that she is beautiful? It has left "J" and I feeling baffled and somewhat upset with her, at times. Earlier today, while completing some errands, "R" and I discussed her reasons for not liking the term "beautiful". She stated that she would rather be "labeled" (her words---not mine!) as "pretty" and "gorgeous". SHE IS 5 PEOPLE!!! My chin literally hit the steering column. "Labeled", "Pretty", "Gorgeous"!?!?!?!?!?!?! WHAT!?!? "First off", I said, "we do NOT wear labels in this family, "R"." What on earth? I explained to her that she is precious to her dad and I....and that she has an amazingly "beautiful" heart! I love her creativity, her passions and zest for life, her heart for serving others, etc. She is an amazing kid!

The more I sat and pondered our discussion, the more my heart ached. It breaks my heart that my 5 year old knows and understands "labels". When I was 5, the most I worried about was making it home in time to play outside before dinner. My heart aches, because the reality, of LIFE, is sinking in...for me and my 5 year old daughter. Reality of what, you ask? That society has placed "labels" on all of us--whether we are "Losers", "Too Fat", "Too Thin", "Uneducated", "Poor", "Ugly" or "Beautiful", etc. I just never imagined it would start at 5 years old. I label that "Pathetic"!

So, although I can't get her to explain why she does not desire to be told ("labeled") that she is "beautiful"...I will respect her desires.

No matter what, she will always be "J" and I daughter....and she is most especially HIS daughter!

I prayed these words for my daughters and husband today....I didn't realize how badly I needed to hear these words, for MYSELF.

30 Avant le 30!

2011-02-04T11:29:00.001-08:00

In an attempt to accomplish #15 on my 30 Before 30, I have been studying French. I am enjoying it, I think. I am not sure I have a great grasp on the dialect...it has been years since I performed opera's and my dialect is sketchy, at best. In this learning process, I am working on one key phrase or question a day...it is about all I can commit to right now. So, today's question of the day is: <>

Où la salle de bains est ?

It is one, if not the most, important question I can know...especially while toilet training a toddler.

If all else fails, I will just resort to watching re-runs of Julia Child...cause nothing screams French quite like a Californian, who had an English accent(in my opinion), who also happened to love French cooking! Bon Appetit!

So yes, Micah Wingington....I am working on my 30 Avant le 30! :)

Brrrrrrrrr!

2011-02-02T19:12:00.000-08:00

Brrrrrrr! That is essentially all you will hear out of our mouths these days.....and who can blame us? Yesterday, it was a high of -8 degrees with wind chills of -42 degrees! Really? Oh yes! There was frost on the peep-hole! Limited snow fall...just cold! There are no fun pictures to add with this post...cause, well....it was too cold for me to step out and snap a pic....and truly, what would that look like? "Here is a picture of the frozen grass!" Ha ha ha!

30 Before 30---Revised!

2011-01-28T15:57:00.000-08:00

Keep an eye out for the **...they are revisions to my 30 Before 30!

1.GET DEBT FREE

2. No eating out for an entire year...this will be tough, but I love a challenge

3. Get my butt back in shape and run the marathon I have been "training" for---I have been "training" for the last 7 years ;) and run in at least 2 before I am 30

**4. Get accepted into the UC Denver MSN program

5. Finally take my honeymoon (on my 10 year anniversary) to Ireland

6. Sing a musical special at church

7. Play the part of Velma Kelly in Chicago

8. Read 20 non-medical books in a year

9. Summit Pikes Peak

10. Advocate locally and abroad for the rights of women and children

11. Learn to knit

12. Learn Nordic Cross Country Skiing

13. Graduate with my Bachelor degree in Public Health

14. Attend a midwifery workshop at The Farm Midwifery Center

15. Learn a foreign language (French, I think...)

16. Make myself, "R", and "A" our own dresses

17. Get another tattoo

18. Read through the Bible

19. Become a CAPPA Certified Lactation Educator

20. Travel on Route 66

21. Journal daily in my daughters' journals

**22. Cook an entire cookbook

23. Organize a community COMPOST and Sustainable Garden Club

24. Visit Washington DC and the surrounding communities (explore American history) with "J" and the girls

25. Learn yoga

26. Grow my hair out passed my breasts

27. Write an article and have it published in Midwifery Today

28. Take a dance class...again (I danced for over 13 years (4 of which were at a professional level)

29. Take a family vacation with "J", "R", and "A"...and any additional children we might be blessed with

30. Be a key-note speaker at a birth professional related conference

Convictions

2011-01-28T10:38:00.000-08:00

Conviction--a belief or opinion that is held firmly

These past few weeks have been one steeped in the conviction of my heart. Recently, I blogged about my journey of midwifery. I truly feel that GOD placed the passion for mother's/women and babies on my heart and it is HIS desire that I pursue an education and career as a midwife. So, it was no big surprise to many that I applied to midwifery college...except for maybe GOD. Let me explain midwifery---there are two paths a midwife can take.

One, becoming a CPM (certified professional midwife) A CPM is a direct-entry midwifery practitioner who has met all the certification standards set by the North American Registry of Midwives (NARM). What distinguishes a CPM from other nationally certified midwives is that CPMs attend to out-of-hospital births and are trained via a competency-based model of education. NARM recognizes competency-based education as the optimal model for educating maternity care providers practicing in out-of-hospital settings because it is the only model that requires clinical experience in out-of-hospital settings, continuity of care, and risk assessment skills, which are required to determine when referral, collaboration or consultation with a physician is necessary.

Now, there are also CNM--In the United States, a Certified Nurse-Midwife ("CNM") is an Advanced Practice Nurse who has specialized education and training in both Nursing and Midwifery. CNM's function as primary healthcare providers for women and most often provide medical care for relatively healthy women, whose birth is considered uncomplicated and not "high risk," as well as their neonate. Certified Nurse-Midwives, in most states, are required to possess a minimum of a graduate degree such as the Master of Science in Nursing, or Post-Master's Certificate. By 2010, all Certified Nurse Midwives will be required to hold a graduate (Masters) degree. Most recently, the first Doctor of Nursing Practice (DNP) program has become available for Certified Nurse-Midwives and will graduate its first class in May 2010. Additionally, Certified Nurse Midwives must also hold an active Registered Nurse license in the state in which they practice. Certified Nurse Midwives practice in hospitals and medical clinics, and may also deliver in birthing centers and attend at-home births. They are able to prescribe some medications, treatments, medical devices, therapeutic and diagnostic measures, et al. in all 50 states. CNMs, while their specific scope of practice will vary depending on which state they are licensed to practice, in most states they provide medical care to women from puberty through menopause, including care for their newborn (neonatology), antepartum, intrapartum, postpartum and nonsurgical gynecological care.

Ok, so you might be asking yourself...how does this relate to Kari feeling conviction from the LORD? Well, as I stated, I knew that GOD desired for me to become a midwife, specifically to become a CNM. So, what did I do? I opted for the CPM route because I was deathly afraid of failing. Lame, right? I mean, who am I to argue the will of the LORD? I can't even make my own heart beat but I think I can challenge the LORD's will for my life and still succeed? Ha! These past few months have been littered with "obstacles" that I now see where GOD offering me the opportunity to repent and turn towards HIM in this journey. Instead, I ran faster and further ahead of HIM---dodging HIM at every stop. That came to a huge end on Monday. While in clinic (I have been apprenticing with a local CPM), I heard the traumatic birth story of women. It rattled me to my very core....GOD was working through this unassuming woman as she sat across from me and poured out her heart. To fight back tears, I bowed my head on several occassions throughout the interview (she was interviewing the midwife in the hope of hiring her for a home birth). My heart was in distress. I knew all along that GOD was calling me to pursue the CNM route---to work closely in the field of hospital based care---to act as a "change agent" and educator on the necessary reform in the hospital based maternal and fetal care. How could I help mother's---just like this one that was sitting before me---if I am not where GOD has called me to be? How can I sit and critisize and expect change--- of the very system I am called to serve--when I not working in that system? So, long story short---GOD penitrated my heart and over the course of several days: hundreds of tissues have been used (lots of crying), I have talked with so many---seeking wisdom, and lots of pray(...and I mean LOTS!) I am withdrawing from the current midwifery program that I am enrolled in and I will be pursuing the CNM route via CU Denver. This journey will be long and not without difficulty...I am sure, but I know now that I am to "rely on the LORD my GOD---and not to lean on my own understanding."--Proverbs 3:5-6.

GOD has blessed me throughout the week with wisdom in words. It has been tremendously helpful and reassuring. So, when I logged on to FB this morning...in the status of a dear friend, I read this:

"Little life lesson found in the stillness--when you're busy not doing what you aren't called to do anyway, it is easy to critique and say how things "should" be, but when you're busy doing what you ARE called to do, not focused on critiquing others--you find yourself praising God for the grace to handle your own tasks. Without Him, you couldn't do your task at hand." ~DB

Preparing For Birth & Sacred Circle Doula Services

2011-01-16T09:16:00.001-08:00

To find out more about Kari, Sacred Circle Doula Services, Preparing For Birth and the services we offer...follow the links below.

Thanks!

http://prepforbirth.com/

http://www.sacredcircledoulaservices.com/

My Professional Profile

2011-01-16T09:15:00.001-08:00

Kari began her professional education as a nurse in 2003. To fulfill her own desires for a family, Kari “retired” from hospital based care in 2005. After the birth of her second child in 2008 and assisting with a birth in early 2009, her passion for birth, mothers, and babies was reignited.

Kari began certification courses as a birth professional in 2009. She has completed the CAPPA Childbirth Educator training and is currently working to obtain her CAPPA certification. She has also completed the CAPPA and DONA Labor Doula training and is CAPPA certified.

In 2011, Kari will begin apprenticing homebirth midwife, Dotti Kirkpatrick and studying midwifery at the Midwives College of Utah.

Kari is also attending AMU to complete a Bachelor degree in Public Health.

It is Kari’s desire and personal belief that each woman is able to have the kind of birth she desires. Pregnancy and childbirth is one of the most profound experiences for a woman and her partner. Kari believes God gives grace and strength to each laboring woman.

She currently resides in Colorado Springs, Colorado and is blessed to have the support of her husband and two wonderful children.

For more information on Kari’s doula and other services, go to: Sacred Circle Doula Services website.

Professional Memberships:

CAPPA (Childbirth and Postpartum Professional Association)
Birth Network of Colorado Springs
Colorado Doulas Association
Pikes Peak Regional Doula Association

Open House!!!!

2011-01-16T08:41:00.000-08:00

Since my journey towards doula (CLD) (a non-clinical, labor support professional) certification began in 2009, GOD has blessed me with wisdom, patience, and guidance.

In 2010, I was given one of the most amazing opportunities...to be mentored by Desirre Andrews! Now, I understand that many of you will not know, or perhaps likely care, who Des Andrews is, but the opportunity was GOD's work...and all I can say is, WHOA!!! Des began working as a birth professional in 1994 and her work has reached thousands all over the world! Desirre and her colleague, Lori Welch, recently asked me to join the Preparing For Birth Childbirth Education team! I am currently one step away from official certification as a childbirth educator (CCCE) and I am thrilled!

We recently signed a lease on our very own office suite!!! :) Yesterday, Saturday January 15th--we hosted a community-wide Open House. It was a success! Mind you, I came home exhausted...but we hosted well over 80 families over the course of four hours! We greeted friendly faces, former doula and education families we have served, and tons of new families-- who are excited about the services we offer and how it can bless their pregnancies, births and postpartum. GOD is mighty!

I am clinging to 2 Cor. 5:7 "For we walk by faith not by sight". When I look back to 2009 when I began this journey and flash forward to present day, I am in awe. Below is a mini-timeline of recent events in my professional career. I praise GOD daily for the blessings HE has provided to me and my family! The biggest blessing...to have an amazing husband and two beautiful babes who love, support, and pray for me daily. <>

September 2009--Attended my first Labor Doula training
November 2009--Created Sacred Circle Doula Services LLC
www.sacredcircledoulaservices.com
2009-2010--Blessed to serve as Labor Doula with 7 families!
2010--Attended my second Labor Doula training
2010--Read over 32 birth professional books, 20 studies, and 14 articles
November 2010--Attended a Childbirth Educator training
November 2010--Began student teaching with Preparing For Birth LLC
December 2010--Officially joined the Preparing For Birth team
December 2010--Accepted to MCU (Midwives College of Utah) to study midwifery (Graduation set for September 2013)
January 2011--Began a home birth midwifery apprenticeship
January 15, 2011--An amazing Open House!
January 27, 2011--Thursday night education classes start!
June 2011--Will attend a Lactation Education training---one of many steps to becoming a Certified Lactation Educator (CLE)
June 23-26, 2011--Will attend CAPPA (Childbirth and Postpartum Professional Association) conference in California

Clean Laundry....

2011-01-13T14:22:00.000-08:00

I am in many ways embarrassed to admit that I have spent the better half of two weeks hopping over sorted piles of laundry on my bedroom floor--hoping that they would hop themselves in the wash, dryer, and subsequently put themselves away. Alas, as we embarked on a day without clean undies and socks, I felt it best to put down my studies, and wash. And so, several hours later, and several romps of the heavy ol laundry basket up and down the stairs---I am nearly done! But this blog posting isn't really about my recent absence of housework, but more about the joy it was to do it. Or, at least, to smell it. I am not sure about you, but I love the smell of clean, warm, fresh laundry. I literally buried my face and upper body into the warm pile of pinks and inhaled so deeply, I nearly lifted one of "R's" shirts right off the bed. It made me smile...the smell of the clean laundry made me smile. That got me thinking...what are some additional smells that have/or still bring me joy? So, here is a list of a few of my favorite smells. I am sure as my life continues--there will be additions and modifications...but for now, these are the blessed scents for my snout!

**In no particular odor, I mean order. :)

1. Obviously...clean, warm laundry (and yes, I will contend that the warmth is an essential part of the smell)

2. My mom's homemade mac n cheese (she would often make it for me when I was ill--something her mother did for her)

3. The smell of rain

4. Fresh cut grass (even better when mixed with #3)

5. Fresh compost

6. My husband's homemade fried chicken

7. My homemade biscuits and gravy...yum!

8. The "smell" of hot steam that envelopes my room after someone takes a shower

9. The smell of my bookcase

10. A newborn baby

11. Chai tea

12. Vanilla

13. My kids!

14. Tea tree oil

So, I had to stop myself from listing nearly everything that came to mind. I mean, I could...but you likely stopped reading this post after #2. Ha!

Well, that giant pile of warm, smelly laundry needs to be folded and put away. And, be sure to stop and smell the roses...or at least your laundry!

Not Big on Resolutions.....

2011-01-01T16:47:00.000-08:00

I am not usually one that has New Year resolutions....but this year, I am striving to blog more. Now, with that said, I aim to blog at least once a month throughout the year. So, all my blog followers, PLEASE KEEP ME ACCOUNTABLE!!!

Thanks! HAPPY NEW YEAR!

30 Before 30!

2011-01-01T16:05:00.000-08:00

I have an amazing friend and fellow blogger who created her 30 Before 30 list a few months ago. Now that I have reached 26 and I have 4 years remaining....I think I better nip my list in the butt and get moving on accomplishing some of these. So, here is my 30 things I would like to accomplish before my 30th birthday! On my way......

***I will preface now, my dear friend who inspired me to accomplish this is much wittier than I am, so please show pity on my terrible sense of humor! (and I also borrowed a few of her items!)

1. GET DEBT FREE

2. No eating out for an entire year...this will be tough, but I love a challenge

3. Get my butt back in shape and run the marathon I have been "training" for---I have been "training" for the last 7 years ;) and run in at least 2 before I am 30

4. Graduate midwifery college (and I will accept it as GOD's will if I don't graduate with honors---but I am striving!)

5. Finally take my honeymoon (on my 10 year anniversary) to Ireland

6. Sing a musical special at church

7. Play the part of Velma Kelly in Chicago

8. Read 20 non-medical books in a year

9. Summit Pikes Peak

10. Advocate locally and abroad for the rights of women and children

11. Learn to knit

12. Learn Nordic Cross Country Skiing

13. Graduate with my Bachelor degree in Public Health

14. Attend a midwifery workshop at The Farm Midwifery Center

15. Learn a foreign language (French, I think...)

16. Make myself, "R", and "A" our own dresses

17. Get another tattoo

18. Read through the Bible

19. Become a CAPPA Certified Lactation Educator

20. Travel on Route 66

21. Journal daily in my daughters' journals

22. Pass the NARM

23. Organize a community COMPOST and Sustainable Garden Club

24. Visit Washington DC and the surrounding communities (explore American history) with "J" and the girls

25. Learn yoga

26. Grow my hair out passed my breasts

27. Write an article and have it published in Midwifery Today

28. Take a dance class...again (I danced for over 13 years (4 of which were at a professional level)

29. Take a family vacation with "J", "R", and "A"...and any additional children we might be blessed with

30. Be a key-note speaker at a birth professional related confernce

My Personalized 12-Do-It-Myself List for 2011

2011-01-01T15:51:00.000-08:00

I am always eager to try new things and get creative on a penny-pinchin' budget! So, after reading this post on the amazing Money Saving Mom blog...I had to create my own list(and I am borrowing a few of hers...cause lets face it--they are awesome ideas!). It has really spurred me to look deep into my heart and mind and stir up my creative juices. So, without further ado...here is my list of 12 Do-It-Myselfers for 2011

1. Make homemade dish washing detergent

2. Make homemade laundry detergent

3. Make a months worth of freezer meals

4. Make at least one loaf of bread a month

5. Harvest and prep freezer fruits and veggies from our garden (Spring and Summer)

6. Organize a local compost and sustainable gardening club

7. Make homemade and ECO friendly cleaning products

8. Make homemade soaps, lotions, balms, etc

9. Hand make all gifts and cards for birthdays, holidays, etc

10. Knit a scarf

11. Make my own marshmallows

12. Make from-scratch Chai tea (cause I love chai--but it is soooo expensive)

Hello 2011...and Our Neglected Blog!

2011-01-01T15:42:00.000-08:00

Hello 2011! 2011!!!!!

I can hardly believe that it is a new year. It is sad for me to think that it has been 10 months since my last blog posting. Shame on me! What a blessed year 2010 was for our family...and we are anxiously excited to see what GOD has in store for our family in 2011. Below is a re-cap of a few of the amazing things that took place for our family in 2010. Please enjoy!

1. "J" returned from his year long deployment in Afghanistan--safely!
2. We enjoyed a wonderful family vacation at Walt Disney World in July
3. WE BOUGHT A HOUSE!
4. I became a CAPPA Certified Labor Doula
5. I began my CAPPA Certified Childbirth Educator training
6. "J" began working on his degree again!
7. I was accepted in the Midwifery program at MCU (I will start in January 2011)
8. We became a mini-van family
9. "J" and I celebrated 7 years of marriage
10. "A" turned 2 years old
11. "R" rides her bike without training wheels :)
12. We celebrated Christmas as a family---first time in 2 years!
13. I was also accepted at AMU and I am working to complete my undergrad in Public Health
14. I was hired by Preparing For Birth, LLC to teach Childbirth Education (our new office opens in January 2011)

Ok, just a few things that we are praising GOD for. HE is sovereign and we are trusting HIM in 2011!

A Few Other Ways We are Getting Debt Free

2010-02-08T09:33:00.000-08:00

Jerry and I also examined some additional "spendings" that we felt we could do without. One: netflix. Don't get me wrong--they are a wonderful company---but was it really worth the $14/month? For us, no. We rationalized it like this: we didn't want to see the movie in the theater, so we likely don't want to see it at home. Enough said. Away with the movie rental.

Secondly, I sat down and examined, re-examined, cross-examined and just about examined every which way the heck out of our grocery budget---trying to find a creative way to lower the spending without lowering the nutrition and substance. Our family loves fruits and veggies---so opting to switch two meal a week at lunch and two meals a week at dinner to meat free wasn't an issue. By eliminating meat we are saving on average $20 a wk! Awesome! I am also using coupons like crazy. I love King Soopers. I try to utilize their weekly savings in conjunction with my coupons(which they double up to $1!). I recently saved 80% on my grocery bill. Hoolah!

So, those are just a few extra little tips we have applied to our budget. I am no guru---but I am the wife and mother to a hubs and two precious little girls---and a child of Christ----on the road to being DEBT FREE!

ON THE ROAD TO FINANCIAL FREEDOM!

2010-02-08T08:36:00.000-08:00

Jerry and I have always had a budget. Making it applicable to our lives...that is another story. It is really hard to me to admit that we have struggled for years with finances, but it is the truth....and in December, God got "down and dirty" with our hearts and pocket books.

We were tired of having to surrender money each month toward credit cards and car payments. Every time we would put money into savings, money would "magically" find its way out---and usually for nonsense. Shame. We also weren't being as committed to tithing as we should be. Double shame. I had recently started listening exclusively to Dave Ramsey during the 9-12o'clock hours Monday-Friday was was loving what information he had to offer. It all made perfect sense....the hard part was making it stick! Like I said, we had had a "budget" for years....making it work was the "chore".

So, over the course of several weeks, I sat down with God, His word, previous budgets, list of debts and necessary bills. It was overwhelming, shocking, humbling, frightening, and overall, a little sickening. I was so ashamed of the lack of real focus on what is truly important. Tithing and saving had fallen to the way-side, frivolous spending was "king", and this "budget" was clearly one big joke. I was stressing, big time! We had so much to learn in order to make this work---and in my frantic, human mind--WE HAD TO LEARN IT ALL NOW AND GET DEBT FREE NOW!!!! Ahhhhhh!

God quickly came in and placed a cool hand of calm over me and said---"Kari, you clearly did not get into this debt mess is one day, one week, or even one month....getting out of debt will be a process too. Keep your eyes on me and I will see you an Jerry through." Foo! What a relief!

So, I got real! Jer and I talked extensively about what is important to us and what are the real "needs" for our family. Our first order of business---get rid of cable! That's right---no cable. And I don't really miss it. I was also willing to part with internet---but since Jer is deployed and the internet is our best communication tool, aside from handwritten letters, we opted to not be hasty and keep it. For some time, I have also felt like God was calling me to home school Roslyn. So, we made the choice to take her out of her preschool program she was attending three days a week at $240/month. Whoa! That freed us up tremendously. I am also saving on gasoline since I no longer have to drive her to and from school. I was weary about taking her out of school and away from her friends....but she loves home school and I love teaching her. It has allowed she, Aly and I more time to be together, play, learn and explore collectively. It has been a real blessing. I wish I would have listened to God sooner. Silly human!

Come January, I was in the thick of developing a true budget and making it work. That is the key...making it work. Well, since January, we have been successful in not only saving money but also paying off a tremendous amount of debt. Praise GOD! We will have a long ways to go but it is so rewarding and freeing to see the mountain of financial disorder turn into something worth praising God for! We have also recommitted ourselves to faithful giving---so freeing and amazing!

Because of this new found appreciation for financial freedom, God also blessed us with the opportunity to take a few vacations this year...something we have NEVER done! EVER! Jerry and I will be taking the girls to Disneyworld in July for 5 days (the entire vacation will be paid off next month!---going on vaca debt free is awesome. I should also preface that we did NOT use a credit card for this vacation. Disney offers a great program---no financing---just reserve your package for $200(goes towards balance) and the remaining balance must be paid in full 60 days out from arrival---no credit cards, finance charges, or interest rates.) Following our return from Florida, my parents will be taking the girls for Jer and I am we are heading to California. Airfare was at a remarkable price---I paid cash for the airfare! We will be renting a car for 5 day----I shopped around for weeks to find the best deal. Found it! Thank you Budget Rent-A-Car! I also shopped to find the best rates for lodging without sacrificing romance, comfort and cleanliness---done! In all, our trip to Cali (with airfare---but not counting food costs--but we do plan on accessing grocery stores vs eateries as much as possible---cause I can use coupons! :) ) will be for under $780! That might seem like a lot---and I am sure it really is in the long run---but we have never taken a vacation of any sort---not even a honeymoon---and after nearly 7 yrs of marriage, 2 kids, and 4 deployments---it is time. God has blessed us with the money and availability to do so----so we are listening and obeying.

Ultimately, our goal is COMPLETE FINANCIAL FREEDOM---period! I have come to realize that cash isn't king---GOD IS! There will never "be enough money" in the world---but God's love is eternal and abounding. Our goal is to an authentic family who serves the Lord our God will our time, our works, and our MONEY!

Our 2010 Focus Statement:

With GOD leading the way, we, Jerry and Kari (Roslyn and Alyssa), pledge to serve and honor GOD in all we do--in our marriage, parenting, Christ-centered giving, work, use of finances, etc.

4 Years Old

2010-01-31T08:04:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I failed to make a post for Roslyn's 4th bday. Oops.

Miss Roslyn turned 4 on January 5th! We had an amazing day celebrating! She hosted some friends at our local CFA and Aly and I treated her too dinner and cookies at Red Robin. It is hard to believe that she is 4.

Roslyn...you are an amazing little girl. You are strong, brave, compassionate, and creative. You love art, dance, singing, playing with your sister, reading, and making me laugh. You love to help cook and clean(I am praying this lasts). You are God's blessed gift and I am thrilled I was the one to receive you. Your dad loves you so much and treasures you. You are so beautiful and sweet Roslyn.

You are full of life and love. I feel so blessed to be your mother.

Happy (Belated) Birthday Ros!

Haiti, Weekly Allowance, and Nicole Kidman

2010-01-23T12:34:00.000-08:00

Like many of you, my heart has been grieved by the painful images of hurt and hungry Haitian's in the wake of last Tuesdays earthquake. As a Christ follower, a mother, and a compassionate person, my heart and spirit have been under some heavy convictions. Convictions of how I spend my time, money, and my love. Yesterday, I was made aware that I am not alone. Roslyn begged me to donate her monthly allowance of $10 to the Haiti Relief Efforts. (**earlier in the week, she and I assembled piles of clothes, shoes and toiletries to send). Jerry and I had already placed a monetary donation to Compassion International's Haiti Relief---but clearly, God wanted to make a larger impression on my heart through my child and her desire to give.(This certainly has not been God and Roslyn's only message to me this week about selfless giving and a servants heart. Earlier in the week she told me "Mom, I want to be more like GOD. He is strong, brave and loves everyone!" and when we were waiting at a stop light and noted a homeless man of the side of the road with a sign asking for mercy and some assistance, she begged me to help him. I did---I gave him all the remaining cash I had in my wallet). So, last night during the Hope for Haiti Now telethon, I placed a $10 donation in Roslyn's name towards the Red Cross' Haiti Relief efforts. (It took me nearly 1 1/2 hrs to get through but when I did, to my surprise, Nicole Kidman took my call.) She and I spoke briefly, I placed my donation and then concluded my night by carrying Roslyn to bed. As I carried Roslyn up the stairs, I thought about the mothers and fathers that are walking the streets in search of their children. What pain and anguish they must be feeling? I sat in bed for nearly 2 hours praying to GOD and asking for guidance in the areas of my life I have been feeling conviction and anguish. My prayer is simple but one that I still can't stop praying.

Dear GOD,

Please free me from my selfish needs, thoughts, and feelings. Help open my mind, heart, and spirit to know YOUR will and to follow it with a selfless attitude. Thank YOU for saving me and loving me continually, despite my constant short comings. Please be with those who have yet to know that salvation in YOU is the only way to eternal life. Please continue to mold me to be an instrument of YOUR using to help guide others to Christ--in word, action and deed. Heavenly Father, watch over my daughters, my husband, family and friends---watch over the people of Haiti, Lord--they are hurting and need YOUR love and provisions. Amen.

On a journey...

2010-01-23T12:11:00.001-08:00

Many of you may know that I am working towards my DONA International Birth Doula certification. It is a process that has been truly rewarding and challenging. I recently launched a website, and I am thrilled about it. Below is the link to the home page. I would love to hear your thoughts of the site, positive suggestions, and ideas. I feel so blessed and honored to be this journey of life and to share in it with birth mothers and partners...it is truly rewarding. Enjoy the site.

www.sacredcircledoulaservices.com

~Created~

2009-12-30T08:35:00.000-08:00

Since I have been made in the likeness of Christ--why then do I insist on holding myself to the world's standards?

Ephesians 4:22-24 "You were taught, with reguard to your former self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put in the new self, created to be like GOD in true righteousness and holiness."

Motherhood

2009-12-29T14:00:00.000-08:00

All too often, I find myself rushing around-laundry, chores, errands, meetings, kid activities, etc---because we are made to believe as mom's that "we must" in order to be a "great mom." Today, I retired that train of thought and sat quietly in my messy home, with my two precious daughters, wrapped up in my arms. Honestly, I felt more like a mom in those 20 minutes than I have in the last 4 years. :) Thank you GOD for bringing this peace of thought, soul, and spirit into my life.

Genesis 4:1 "With the help of the Lord I have brought forth a child."

One Year Ago....

2009-11-18T19:30:00.000-08:00

One year ago....

One year ago I would have never imagined I would be in the throws of labor with my second child. God had already blessed Jerry and I with an incredibly beautiful little girl and we were amazed that He was blessing us with another!

This year has been an amazing journey! Alyssa, you came into our world with such an amazing spirit and grace, and you have taught me so much about myself and life! You are an absolute joy and a blessing to all. I am thrilled to be your mother!!!

Your daddy is currently serving in Afghanistan and is not able to be here for your 1st birthday. However, he had this message for you.... "Alyssa, I love you with all my heart and I wish I could be there to celebrate your 1st birthday! Daddy is so proud of you!!!"

Sleep and dream tonight of the amazing possibilities that lay before you....

I love you Alyssa....my sweet baby!

My Poor Neglected Blog

2009-10-29T10:31:00.000-07:00

Hello Ol' Friend. I haven't forgotten you!

Seems these days, we are busier than ever. I am working fearlessly at completing my DONA International Birth Doula certification, caring for two very active, AWESOME, and busy kiddos, and just going with the flow of life.

I promise to update and upload pictures very soon. For now, back to the crazy ol' world!

Up To Our Eyeballs in Ickies!

2009-10-04T13:32:00.000-07:00

What a week! First, let my preface, if you have a weak stomach...don't read on.

Ok, so our "ordeal" started Tuesday when "A" woke up at 430am with a fever and cough. She was quick to take down some Tylenol and thankfully, she returned to sleep with little fuss. As the day progressed, so did her bad attitude, general discomfort and fever. Shortly into the morning hours of Wednesday, "R" woke up with a raging fever and cough. So, I scheduled an appt with their pediatrician for the morning and worked on making everyone comfortable for the time being. Once at the Dr's, he proceeded to diagnose the girls with croup and sent us on our way.

Friday night, "A", having refused solids and nursing most of the day, proceeded to induce vomiting all over me and her bedroom floor. GROSS!! Her fever was raging at 104.8 and that was after Motrin and Tylenol just 2 hours prior. She was miserable, and rightfully so. So, we headed up to the ER (which I hate doing) but I was gravely concerned since she wasn't responding to meds, she wasn't eating and now was vomiting. We waited for nearly 2 1/2 hrs before being seen and poor "R" conked out in a waiting room chair. Thankfully, I have a "nanny" now and she came to the rescue. She took "R" home for the night....and thank goodness she did. Our ER visit lasted till 4am the following morning. "A's" diagnoses: aggressive upper respiratory infection, ear infection, and dehydration. Thank God we had a doctor that was willing to sit and listen, test, and care for "A" with compassion.

It is now Sunday, and fevers are gone. Thanks be to God! However, coughs and buggers are plentiful. Inside stock tip: buy stock in Kleenex, Motrin and Purell...we have easily consumed most families yearly supply in just 6 days.

We are terribly stir-crazy in the house. So pray, not just for physical healing, but also for sanity....whatever that is! Although, "R" and "A" have made me laugh today....including when "R" shouted, "Momma, we are up to our eyeballs in ickies and I don't think we can take it anymore!" LOL

WHOA!

2009-09-15T11:07:00.001-07:00

WHOA! Have I ever failed this poor blog. So much has changed in the last few months, I hardly know where to begin. Here we go....

1. "J" has been gone a little over 3 months now. Some days it feels like an eternity...some days the reality that 9 more months are still ahead of us slaps me the face. Overall, I am not one to complain about it...it is what it is. God is faithful and is protecting "J" and our family. :)

2. "R" has started Junior K. WHAT?! Where did my baby go? Hard to believe that she will be 4 years old soon. AWWWW! She is doing amazingly well. We followed up with all the pediatric medical teams regarding "R" legs and the Dr's feel that this is something she will grow out of...no treatment needed! Praise GOD! "R" hit an emotional rough patch shortly after "J" left, but in true "R" form, she rallied back and is doing great. She and I try very hard to spend one on one time together everyday and I like to read to her from her "kiddie" Bible. We pray and talk about her joys, fears, and questions. It really makes a difference in her overall spirit. She is just plain AWESOME. So blessed to have her!

3. What is there to say about "A"? Plenty! She has got to be one of the funniest, sweet, entertaining kiddos to have graced the earth. She will be 10 months old this week!! Hard to believe. She is always moving, energetic, and smiling. She loves to eat, sing, dance, and play with "R". She is a bit of a home body, still loves to nurse, and hates having her face wiped. She is cruising all over the place and occasionally will stand independently and try to take a step or two....I am not sure she trusts herself enough yet to just go for it, but that will come with time. She is such a joy to have present in our lives. Love that silly little girl!!

4. "J" has been working hard. No really changes to his day to day activities...which I think is starting to get to him a little. Not that he (or I) are begging for crazy action, but I think he is beginning to feel the "funks" as he transitions further into the deployment. GOD is faithful though..."J" is safe and healthy! He is trying very hard to work on his History degree, but with the chaos of work, I don't think much gets done. All is time, I'm sure.

5. As for me.... I have started back to school and I am loving the transition. I spent the early part of my "college-aged life" searching for my purpose within the medical community. Something in me changed recently, and I am not sure the "medical" aspect needs to be present. I am happy to announce that I am stepping out of the clinical realm and into the emotional and spiritual realm of "medicine" if you will. I am working toward my DONA International Doula Certification!!!! YAH!!!! I recently returned from a conference/workshop this weekend and feel so empowered....and I think that is what it is all about. Empowering women to find the strength, that we are possess, to have our babies...and to feel strong, passionate, and empowered enough to stand up for ourselves and our birth plans.

Ok, coming down off my soap box now. Overall, I am well. I desperately need to focus some attention on my back yard, could probably work out a little more (oops!), and should probably not spend so much time wrapped up in reading (I have read 5 books in the last 3 months!). Oh well!

Overall, we are good....just taking it day by day. More updates to follow, I'm sure. Perhaps even some photos?!

Frustrated with "Modern Technology"

2009-06-30T09:27:00.000-07:00

I am so frustrated with "modern technology"! First, let me say that I think we as a society have become too reliant on TVs, radio, computers, cell phones, etc. What happened to good old letter writing (I love to get letters....you feel the effort and the personal time put into it) and talking face to face with good friends and loved ones. My real frustration comes over me when I am attempting to communicate with Jerry via messenger and web cam. Either the messenger signal dies or the web cam freezes...usually on a not so flattering image of myself. Now I know that communications during war times have come leaps and bounds and I am so grateful for that....but it is still maddening! I just wish that I could have one, delay-free, static-free phone call...or one messenger/web cam session that doesn't end with my face frozen on the screen and no reply from Jerry (when that happens...it is usually a good indication that our signal is gone...end of conversation!). Any who, enough complaining about it! God is good and he will make sure Jerry knows how much we love him!

GOD BLESS AMERICAN AIRLINES (ESPECIALLY PATRICIA BOND @ DFW)!!!

2009-06-27T07:50:00.001-07:00

Really...yesterday and today could have been better! Running 4 1/2 concourses in Minn/St Paul only to barely make the flight to Detroit, where I loaded plane #1 out of 4 to sit on the runway for 3 hrs and then get strainded in Detroit 22 hours with two kids, to return home via Dallas and sit there for 4 hrs while trying to make a connection through a different airline than what I started on...Sad part...I never made it to my destination of Columbus, Ohio. I ended up turning around and came back to Colo Springs...only to arrive to no luggage or car seats for my kids....who I then drove home with illegally. Now I am waiting on the good graces of a friend to come and sit with my kids while I go get us some dinner and a cell phone charger(cause that happens to be packed in my suitcase which is in OH)...So, note for all those traveling in the future...avoid Northwest/Delta Airlines. Americam Airlines(thank you God for nice, hard working people like Patricia Bond, AA Flight Rep in Dallas) took me "under their wing" for no charge and got me home....First Class I might add! I am exhausted, sore, and I have kankles from walking all over Detroit to catch flights that either were cancelled or departed! And why was I going to all this trouble to get to Columbus, Ohio? A wedding....my brother's wedding!And in case you are wondering how "R" and "A" did through all this....they were PERFECT! Don't get my wrong, we had our moments....but they did so remarkably well considering! I feel so blessed to be home and have my precious girls safe and comforted by their familiar surroundings. It was such a test of my character and faith to take all this on with them. While attempting to sleep last night in Detroit I desperately needed to use the restroom. "R" was asleep on a make-shift bed on the floor by our gate and "A" was racked out in her stroller....do I dare wake them or just hold off and pray to God I don't get a UTI? Well, I trusted God, knowing that He would look over my babies and I asked a complete stranger (a women, mother of three, and nurse who was also waiting to make a connection flight) to sit with my sleeping babes while I went potty. She and I chatted afterwards and I was so greatful for her! God totally put her there for me! God bless you lady at Gate 38A in Detroit...you know who you are! All of the "Angels" God put in my path over the last 36+ hours of travel....God bless you! You helped me and my kids....no words to express my true gratitude!

Memories of a Big Belly

2009-06-22T15:58:00.000-07:00

So, I was cleaning and re-organizing our desk when I came across an old camera. I let "R" play with for about 2 months before I realized that there were old photos dating from our final days at Ft Lewis, WA. I was moved to tears to see the beautiful Puget Sound, pics of "R", "J" and I together....but most importantly, pics of my belly from my pregnancy with "A"!! Had to share of few of these....ENJOY!

"R"....My Energetic Big Girl

2009-06-22T12:09:00.000-07:00

As you might have read in older posts, "R" is so full of life...and often gives me a run for my money. But, truth be told, I am so grateful for her and for who she is! God truly designed her to be so loving, creative, busy, full of life, and even a little "pushy"! Saturday morning while I was attempting to get ready for the day, I heard "R's" muffled giggle coming from my bathroom. I knew it was going to be an interesting encounter...and boy it was! Check out the pictures of "R"...future makeup artist extraordinar!

"A" is Growing Up

2009-06-22T11:57:00.000-07:00

Hard to believe "A" is already 7 months! Where has the time gone? Seems like just yesterday that "J" and I welcomed a petite, 6 lb 3 oz baby girl....and now we tote around a very happy, curious, chubby girl who weighs well over 18 lbs and is easily 27 inches! She still loves to nurse... usually 5-6 times a day. She also eats breakfast(usually a fruit with a grain), lunch(a veggie), and dinner(usually a meat and veggie melody)! She adores her big sister "R", she loves to shout and giggle, rolls everywhere and is learning to crawl. She just loves to drool...especially over a yummy cracker or teething biscuit....although, she hasn't cut one yet! She is such a joy to have in our lives! Enjoy the pics!

Under satan's Attack...Needing Prayer

2009-06-20T19:48:00.000-07:00

Whoa! What a week this has been. First, let me start by saying that not all of it was bad. I had a very dear friend from CA come and visit for a few days. We enjoyed some of the local sights, took in a few movies/tv shows, shared some laughs and memories....just enjoyed the company of one another. Thanks for visiting "M"!!!

However, in the face of what should have been oodles of good times and happiness, I felt so attacked! I felt as though satan was taking every available opportunity to bring me down. It has been hard to rally back...and I have really wanted to just give up completely and retreat home to my mom and dad's! Although, I am sure he would follow!

This whole ordeal started when I went to the doctor for breathing trouble.... was told I had bronchitis (possibly even a touch of pneumonia....great! just what I need!). Put on meds and they seem to be working...so there is God the Father stepping in and knocking satan away on that one!

The real struggle this week has been with "R". Now, I understand that she is 3 1/2 years old...energetic, busy, loud, etc...and it is so much fun to love her. But this week, she has been so bossy, sassy, mouthy, irritating... I hate feeling that way about my own child....but it is true....and speaking/blogging the truth really helps alieve the anger and frustration I have had towards her this week. I am sure some of this is a phase of testing while "J" is gone...testing mom to see what we can get away with....and she is totally aware that I am on my own....so sometimes I think she tries to break me down so that I will give in. And truth be told, sometimes I would love to just turn a cheek and let her have her way....but then no one would win! I just really need prayers for grace in dealing with "R". I recently purchased "Grace Based Parenting" by Tim Kimmel and I am anxious to crack into it.

You know, sometimes I am scared to voice my frustrations/emotions when facing a deployment. From personal experience, I have found that some (not all) non-military find it silly or dumb that a military spouse would be upset or in turmoil during a deployment....cause in their minds, "we knew this was a way of life and we should just accept it and stop complaining." True, we are aware that deployments are a very real and present thing for military families. But does that not make it any less hard to live without a husband, father/mother, etc? "J" has been deployed 3 times(this is # 4) and it still amazes me how fresh and new the pain is each time he leaves.

I guess the bottom line to this "rant" of an blog is....

I miss my companion!!

I know God is guiding us and is providing love and grace.... Thank you Lord for loving an inperfect person such as myself. Please guide me and grant my grace as a mother to "R" and "A". Watch over us and forgive us for were we fail You! Place a hedge of protection around "J" and the men and women serving....may they know Your love and seek Your guidance! Lord, grant this mother and Army wife peace of heart and mind....and strength to overcome my fears, angers, frustrations, and sorrow. Help guide me to be a light of truth and wisdom for You and Your Kingdom. Thank you for loving me.... Amen!

Never Thought It Would Be This Hard

2009-06-13T12:42:00.000-07:00

I never thought it would be so hard to take care of two kids while "J" was deployed. The last deployment,
"R" was almost 1 1/2 years old....and it was still a struggle but it seemed so managable. This time around I have "R" and "A" to care for, while also caring for myself....and I have to admit, this is a struggle. I feel like a lame-oh for feeling this way when it has hardly been a week since "J" left....Lord help me for I still have 51 weeks to go! I shouldn't be so down on myself though....I went solo grocery shopping today at Whole Foods with "R" and "A"...and it was a success. Yes, "A" got fussy and wanted to nurse towards the end...so I made the most of it and bought "R" and I a piece of their yummy wood-fire pizza...we bought our groceries, sat at the eatery section of the store, ate our pizza (while I nursed "A") and then proceeded home...no tears or fuss from either of them. I guess I am just missing my love, confidant, companion...my husband! You never realize how much you rely on someone till they aren't here.....I just miss his face, voice, hugs, etc... I know God is faithful and good! We, "J" and I are seeking Him in all we do...everyday, all day! The girls offer me so much joy and hope for the future....I just have to stay positive and focused! God is in control and He is going to carry "J" and I through this seperation. I feel Him now, embracing me...God is so awesome!

Appreciating Life

2009-05-30T18:55:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a great day! Well, all days tend to be great days...but yesterday I was blessed to see the birth of my friend "S's" son, "B"! Now, I have two precious little one's of my own...and there is no greater blessing than bringing your own child into the world.....but when you are out of the picture and watching it unfold before you....it really makes you appreciate it! It was especially refreshing because "S" and her hubby "B" are first time parents and it was so sweet to see the excitement and wonder on their faces! I walked around the rest of the day on cloud 9, hugging and loving on my girls with such excitement and appreciation for who they are and what they have brought to my life. I praise God every day (several times a day) for "R" and "A" and I so look forward to watching them grow into wonderful, mature young ladies!

Needing to Catch Up

2009-05-24T18:25:00.000-07:00

Whoa! I am not doing very well at maintaining my blog. Seems like a lifetime since my last post back in February! We are celebrating a wonderful Memorial Day weekend....remembering those who served and died for our freedoms and liberties! God bless America!!

It is bittersweet knowing that in just a few weeks "J" will be departing for yet another deployment. Lately, we have looked at the girls and been overwhelmed at how quickly they have changed in such a short time. "A" is already 6 months old...didn't I just bring her home from the hospital? "R" is such a busy 3 1/2 year old! She recently graduated from preschool...is that even possible? "J" has been really overwhelmed with emotions when he thinks about how much they will change before he is able to see them again.

I greatly admire my husband and all the other service men and women who selflessly serve...seperated by thousands of miles and oceans. No comforts of home, no privacy, some with no letters of encouragement and love from the homefront...missing births, deaths, anniversaries, birthdays, milestones in a childs life (ie: talking, walking, first day of schools, graduations, etc). And yet, they continue to serve...and PROUDLY!

This weekend, I honor those who have come before us...who SERVED WITH HONOR! And died for a cause greater than themselves! And I continue to admire those who still serve, knowing the perspective of what it might cost! To you, thank you!

Remember our service men and women...remember what it means to be an AMERICAN! GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!

John David Ward

2009-02-23T12:13:00.000-08:00

We are so thrilled for our friends Dave and Heather Anne. They welcomed their third child, a son, John David, into the world today, Monday February 23, 2009 @ 1229pm. He weighed in at 9 lbs 5 oz, 21 inches! God bless you John David, your parents, and your two big sisters! How exciting....God is good!!!

Need Assistance...

2009-02-23T09:34:00.000-08:00

Can someone explain to me how I add the panel of blogs that I follow...ie: friends blogs, etc? I am unable to find a resource on this silly website that will explain the process. Would appreciate it!! God bless!!!!

My House Is Quiet...

2009-02-23T09:27:00.000-08:00

I am not sure what to make of the silence.... "R" started school today and having returned home, and with "A" napping, the house was so quiet...too quiet. I am sure the silence will grow on me...but I am totally overwhelmed. It is shocking to even hear myself think and to accomplish a task in one setting. I thought "R" would have had a harder time leaving my side...but she took off and never looked back...joining her place in the ranks of preschoolers. I am so proud of her. I will post pictures of her first day soon....I am signing off now so that I might relish in the opportunity to accomplish more household tasks! God bless!!!

Why Kids Do Such Darn Things....

2009-02-17T13:57:00.000-08:00

Today has been such a challenge. Do not get me wrong...I have a wonderful life, a blessed life. But you equal in a 3 year old who loves to challenge and a 3 month old who refuses to nap (which is rare!) and it makes for an interesting day. Back to the 3 year old....she has followed me around all day "un-doing" everything I have seemed to accomplished...ie: she wrecked the beds after I made them, unfolded the laundry, scattered my coupons, etc... And don't think any of this went without "time-outs" and spankings! "A" my 3 month old, as mentioned, has been on the nap protest. I suppose I shouldn't complain and be greatful to mention that she sleeps at night...but it is difficult to accomplish too much during the day when you have a baby attached to your breast all the time! I guess I just needed to "vent" some frustrations...now I am done with my pitty-party....back to being a mom! God bless!!!

Learning to Blog...

2009-01-30T13:09:00.000-08:00

Well, here we are starting a new adventure...Blogging! I was hesitant to start, but having enjoyed so many of my friends blogs, and finding that it is easier updating everyone at one time...it has its appeal! We are settling in nicely here in Colorado. Roslyn and Alyssa are doing great and Jerry and I are so enjoying being parents to two precious little girls!!!